The Mets continue the ridiculous and annoying part of their schedule that involves playing against teams that do not play baseball, but rather some bastardized variation of the sport. The ironic part of this “interleague play” is that pundit after pundit bemoans the fact that the AL teams are at a “disadvantage” because their one-dimensional designated pinch hitter cannot participate. But it gets even more comical when people suggest that the game becomes “dangerous” because the pitchers have to bat and possibly run the bases.

Dear lord … you mean, the pitchers have to ACTUALLY PLAY BASEBALL? What an abomination! How could such a life-threatening proposition be thrust upon them?

And as for the experimental designated pinch-hitters who have to sit out these contests in NL cities, I feel absolutely terrible that these invalids are so completely uncoordinated that they will publicly embarrass themselves and put both their health and their team’s chances at risk by playing the field.

At this point I’d like to point out something: Ted Williams once said that hitting a round ball with a round bat was the single most difficult thing to do in all of sports. To this day, few if any people challenge that sentiment. Yet, there are world-class athletes who are paid millions of dollars a year to specialize in the single most difficult thing to do in all of sports, and yet they can’t also do something as ordinary and mundane as play a defensive position in the field. Go figure.

Anyway, I digress … or did I regress? … this is supposed to be about the Mets vs. the A’s. I’ll make it as quick and painless as possible.