The Mets M*A*S*H
Those who play (or played) baseball probably have used the term “mash” for someone who is a very good hitter … as in, “that guy mashes the ball”, or, “he’s a masher”.
Well, we’re not sure if the Mets have any mashers, because so many of them are banged up (hmm … bangers and mash … and St. Paddy’s day on the way). In fact, it seems as though the Mets currently have 4077 players who are hurting.
(If you got that 4077 joke, and the “M*A*S*H” reference, then you probably also remember the days of Doug Flynn at second base. Props to Walnutz for giving me the headline idea.)
Here is the list of Mets being verbally abused by Hot Lips Houlihan in the infirmary:
– Moises Alou (strained groin)
– Carlos Delgado (hip impingement)
– Ruben Gotay (ankle sprain)
– Ryan Church (headaches / concussion)
– Marlon Anderson (bruised sternum)
– Carlos Beltran (knees)
– Luis Castillo (knee)
– Damion Easley (ankle)
– Jose Valentin (knee)
– Orlando Hernandez (bunion)
– Brian Schneider (sore legs?)
– Brant Rustich (sore shoulder)
In addition, these players are still less than 100%, at various points of returning from injury, but not technically “injured”:
– Duaner Sanchez (shoulder)
– Juan Padilla (elbow)
– Jason Vargas (elbow)
– Ben Johnson (ankle)
Also, Ambiorix Burgos is out for most if not all of the season after Tommy John surgery.
Finally, these players cannot play in games due to visa issues:
– Olmedo Saenz
– Tony Armas, Jr.
– Fernando Tatis
Huh … would have taken less space to list the healthy Mets …
“Wow, that Joe Janish used to mash…..whatever happened to him?”
Met terminology: (the Bad one)
“Jesus H. Christ: this place is starting to look like a M*A*S*H unit.”
That being said — I’d like to have a MASH t-shirt, just in case we run into the same situation as last year…to wear under my jersey.
You’re right, would’ve been a helluvalot easier to list the completely healthy Mets: Wright and Reyes (KNOCK ON WOOD!).
let’s see … Mets At Surgical Hospital ?
how about some Corporal Klinger dressing in women’s clothing jokes?
I was never a big fan of M*A*S*H but I’m sure someone out there can re-write some scenes with the Mets in place.
Guy Conti as Col. Potter … Ramon Castro as Hawkeye … Pedro as Trapper … Willie Collazo as Lt. Mulcahy …
According to Page Six — John Maine handles that in the Women’s bathroom.
I don’t have to knock on Kerry Wood to hurt him….a good, stiff wind would suffice.
“And Anna Benson….as The Beaver”…..ummm…wrong show….